I am in a very strange, impulsive mood right now. But I have decided that I need my ex girlfriend to be my girlfriend again. That is just what has to happen. I need to stop feeling this way and this is the only way to accomplish that.
I have no idea what I’ll do when she inevitably doesn’t want me back because SHE broke up with ME out of nowhere and I’m a pathetic piece of shit and she never loved me, but right now I’ll just hope that she does want me back. I could never forgive her or trust her again, but I would make it work to stop feeling this awful.
I realize how completely batshit crazy I sound, but I am in a place where I just need to have her back, despite all the fucked up shit she’s done. It is the only way I can ever be okay again. That is the only option. I don’t know.